Lasek Day 1

I drove to Delft this morning with Wilbert for my laser eye surgery, and everything went well. Had a difficult spell this afternoon when we got home, lots of pain and a constant stream of tears, but after opening my eyes for a while, the pain went away! I am taking no less than 7 medications (5 drops and 2 pills), so the pain is well-managed (as well as infection and inflammation). I already have a marked increase in my vision, but the monitor is making my eyes hurt, so I'll keep this short. All in all, a good first day. It could get worse before it gets better, though, so Í'm prepared for that.

The treatment itself was a piece of cake. It was slightly gross to smell the laser burning a hole in your eye, but other than that, not a lick of pain during the procedure. The doctor (Monika Ladesz) was excellent, and I recommend her to anyone. In general, VisionClinics is what you would expect of a high-priced private clinic: the best, most trustworthy, and service-oriented. I go back for my first exam tomorrow and again on Thursday, when they remove the contact lens bandages I have on. But for now, I'm feeling great!

13 hours and counting...

Nokia Fashionista Disaster

With the exception of a lovely chat with Anneloes and David outside after escaping this tired excuse for a social event, the Amsterdam Fashion Week opening party sponsored by Nokia was an unmitigated disaster. :@

Held at the Stadsschouwburg in Amsterdam, we waited for more than half an hour to get in, and would have never gotten in had we not powered our way to the front of the line. We didn't have tickets but were on the Nokia guest list, so you'd think we would have been treated a little better. When we got inside we found a crowded, tropically warm room with a very unglamorous group of people. Very little going on except for a single crowded bar, a bunch of wannabes trying to figure out why they were there and a few second-rate Dutch celebs. Tired! We wandered around for about 30 minutes then decided to get out.

Then when we tried to leave they wouldn't let us because there was too large a crowd outside waiting to get in. And the emergency exits were locked! Can you say fire trap? We were afraid they were going to sell us into slavery to make third-rate Nokia phones in a third-world country somewhere. I then got out my Sony-Ericsson phone (the apparent brand of choice at this party!) and threatened to call the police if they woldn't let us out. Anneloes threatened to fake a fainting spell. I think here threat was by far more dramatic; you win, honey!

So the only good thing that came out of this was a nice chat with two new friends. Thankfully the first half of the evening went MUCH better (see above), and the trip to Amsterdam wasn't a total loss.

Special occasion?

Is this the last time I will ever put a contact lens in my eye? With laser surgery on Monday it very well could be! I'm not allowed to wear them the day before surgery, so today was likely the last time; knock on wood!

Sleepy ball of feline love

Our oldest, Angel.

Looking butch!

Got my hair cut this week and am looking pretty butch! She went a bit overboard with the clippers but I'll survive.
I'm really conscious of the fact that when I put in my contacts today that it could easily be the last time I ever do so and that feeling is so bizarre! Lasek eye surgery on Monday, wish me luck!
Last night I missed the last step of the staircase at home and managed to fall on a knee. Ouch! Could barely note it without screaming last night but a lot better this morning.
Tonight improvisational comedy and dinner followed by the closing party of Amsterdam Fashion Week.

Our neighborhood

Unfortunately our street isn't this gorgeous, but this is right around the corner and is really peaceful and lovely.

Christo With Blogging Camera On The Loose!

This is what my hot man looks like during a hot night of shopping! And you'll be seeing a lot more photos like this because of the Sony Ericsson K800i, which has a 3.2 megapixel camera and lets you take a photo and send it directly to your blog, like I just did here! Cool, eh?

Finally!

After many difficult, sleepless nights of extreme heat, it finally got cool enough last night to sleep with the duvet again! Cool!

Saeco Primea Cappuccino

Our new pride and joy! This little puppy makes every DELICIOUS kind of coffee imaginable! Purchased from the fabulous folks at Kaldi Koffie in Purmerend, this fully automatic machine makes 8 different kinds of coffee (and tea!) and includes a fresh milk container that it uses to steam perfect frothy milk for cappuccino (3 cm thick foam on top!). And it has the sexiest little touch screen controls! Very gadgety!

We're having lots of fun making every conceivable type of coffee possible, but my favorite, considering the current heat wave, is of course an iced latte! :-)

I have an old Saeco Nespresso machine (fully automatic) for sale with 150 Nespresso capsules to whoever gives me the best offer!

Sick & Tired

I've been fooling myself for a long time. Fooling myself that I can be this overweight without any consequences. But in recent years the signs have started to pile up, and I just can't ignore them any longer. I'm getting increasingly tired. I've had some funny diseases. I'm snoring. My knees hurt. It's getting more and more uncomfortable to travel. I really hate the way I look. And I hate the lack of activity, adventure and fun in my life. And I hate to disappoint Wilbert, who is the most accepting and loving person I could ask for, but I know it hurts him to see me this way too. I'm becoming more and more of a hermit and I don't like it. And I'm back at the weight I was at when I started dieting some 7 years ago. Lost 50kgs and gained it all back again. I'm furious with myself.

So time has come to do something. To break out of this spiral before it becomes a self-fulfilling death sentence. I'm going to an obesity clinic on Friday for a group information session and intake discussion for possible surgery; probably a lap-band (a silicon band filed with saline that they put around the top of your stomach, essentially creating a smaller stomach without actually cutting into the stomach itself).

I refuse to give up my life without a fight.

So wish me luck. You can follow my adventures here online. No dates yet. Have to get through the laser vision correction surgery first on Monday!

How many people have this picture of themsevles?

Sorta cool to have a picture of the day when it all began, eh? Much more common with digital photography these days, but a rarity for someone who was born in the '60's, I think! I treasure this quite a bit!

Jan & Michael

After having a mediocre Japanese dinner on the town square (where there was a fat guy who put me to shame both in the size and ability to eat department - he kept ordering more and more and more!), we went to visit some long-time acquaintances who we both like very much because of their down-to-earth and incredibly friendly natures, Jan & Michael. Wilbert has been chatting with them recently on the internet, but we'd never really had time to get to know them without other (slightly loud) people around. We had a lovely evening of conversation, coffee and cocktails in their backyard, which provided some welcome relief from the heat. All in all, it was a really relaxed evening with some really nice people, and hope we get to do it again soon! www.jansnoek.nl

Cna yuo raed tihs?

fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too!

Cna yuo raed tihs? I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid! Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? Yaeh, and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

Remembering Todd

Christine, Me, Peio and Louis in Madrid. Christine & Louis are Todd's younger brother and sister, and Peio is my friend from San Sebastian who introduced me to Todd before he died in 1991.

Surprise from the Past

I've been so on the move this past week that I haven't even had time to tell the most amazing story: how a gifted but troubled young gay man who chose to end his life 15 years ago brought four people together in Madrid last weekend to remember him, tell stories of his and their lives, revel in Madrid's Gay Pride celebration in his (and our) honor, and strike up new friendships while healing old wounds.

I was sitting at dinner with colleagues at the Clubhouse in Vouliagmeni, Greece (see below), when I got a call from a TV producer from the U.S., who said he was making a film about an old friend of mine, Todd , whose name I didn't immediately recognize. It then hit me like a bolt of lightning what he was talking about. He had found me through research and the internet... I had spoken to Todd's mother once briefly shortly after it happened, and they found my parents, who gave them my mobile number.

The story 15(+) years ago.

- Todd graduated from high school and went backpacking across Europe.

- He met Peio on the street and they spent four beautiful days together.

- He went on his way, but they stayed in touch.

- Todd went to college but made plans to come to Spain to study and see Peio.

- Peio, in the meantime, met Javi and decided to move in with him.

- Todd came to Spain anyway to study, but to another city.

- He had difficulty with the superficiality of gay life in Madrid, and struggled with not wanting to disappoint his parents.

- He and Peio remained friends, and Todd accepted that Peio was in a committed relationship.

- Todd visited Peio in San Sebastian where I met him.

- Peio's boyfriend Javi pitched a fit, and Todd went home.

- I needed a place to stay in Madrid, so called Todd.

- I went to Madrid, but Todd was nervous and depressed, and demanded I find somewhere else to stay.

- When there was nowhere else to stay, he kicked me out anyway. I found a place.

- I flew home, and after a few days got a telegram for Peio that Todd had jumped to his death.

- I was devastated, and for 15 years had thought I was the last one to see him alive (now we're not so sure).

- Actual cause/circumstances of death were never determined/known by family/friends.

So that brings us to present time.

MTV-owned gay & lesbian LOGO network in the U.S. is doing a documentary on gay siblings, and Todd's twin brother and sister are gay as well. They were going to fly to Madrid and record images of them remembering their dear older brother. I then suggested we find Peio and bring him in as well. With one consultation of Google.es, I found him, called him, and he agreed to come to Madrid. It was the first time I'd spoken to him in 13 years, as we'd lost touch several years after I left Spain. Bizarre that it was so easy to find him!

It was an emotionally and physically exhausting weekend. I wasn't actually aware of the whole Peio/Todd love affair because when I knew Peio, he was with Javi and didn't confide his history with Todd to me. I imagined that I, being the last one to supposedly see him alive, would have the most to tell Louis and Christine, but I didn't. And Peio had been carrying around a significant amount of guilt for the last 15 years about Todd's death (we told him that's rediculous, but people feel what they feel and there's nothing you can do about it). The bond between Christine, Louis and Peio was clear, and in the end I actually played a very small part in the story (other than supporting Peio through this difficult time.

After the interview (program will air on LOGO in November and we'll get DVD's of it), we were surprised with the fact that some of us would be going on a float in the gay pride parade, a huge affair in Madrid. But there were only four "places" and the obligatory costume (tight t-shirt) didn't fit me. And having been clearly sidelined by Peio's powerful story and with the cameras still rolling, I was left to walk behind the float, which thoroughly exhausted me. It might sound exaggerated, but that's the way I felt.

The parade, however, was fun, and I survived it (it was VERY hot!) because of the excellent company of the Spanish translator we had (completely unncessary considering my presence) and her girlfriend, both of whom where delightful and charming women. They took good care of me.

We then met Peio's current boyfriend of six years, who was struggling with the situation, but came around after meeting the twins and hearing the story. He was adorable and very sweet, I hope I get to spend more time with him and Peio in the Basque Country.

In the evening, we went to dinner with the whole gang to the Kupula Basque restaurant (see below), where Peio and I had eaten the night before as well. It was a fun time and the wine/food flowed freely. In the end, Louis picked up the bill and surprised us all with his generosity. I then went back to my hotel while the others went out, because I was flying out the next morning and it was already 2.30 in the morning. They stayed out til after 5, so I was glad I did.

The following day, Peio, Louis and Christine had tattoos done that were appropriate for the occasion: per aspera ad astra (through the thorns, to the stars) - a statement of the sacrifices required in order to achieve a better situation in life. We all mourn the fact that Todd didn't make it through the thorns of coming out as a young man in the early '90's, but celebrate the inspiration he gave us while he was alive and the gratitude we have for the fact that we were luckier and did make it through the thorns and to the stars.

18 hours at home with Wilbert and the kitties, then off to Rome (see below). Now home for three days before Prague, so happy to be spending a 2-day weekend at home. Clebrating Wilbert's belated birthday with a hamburger barbeque and his friends on Sunday. Looking forward to it. And looking forward to staying in touch with Peio in the future as well.

Week from Hell

I want to crawl in my bed and not come out for a week. After a very busy but pleasant two weeks (Copenhagen, Amsterdam, Athens, Madrid, then back to Amsterdam for only 18 hours), all hell broke loose in Rome and I nearly lost it. The taxi's were on strike, and it took a lot of time (and money) to get from A to B to C. At one point I threatened the hotel where the conference was that I would sleep in their lobby if they didn't give me a room (to no avail). I also threatened the conference organizers that I would get on a plane and fly home before giving my presentation unless they got me sorted out (which they did their best at). In the end I went for the only sure thing I could get, which was a room at the airport hotel with guaranteed shuttle service to and from the conference. Beds were too hard, but watching World Cup games in the bar was fun (especially Italy-Germany - the Italian crowd went nuts!).

My saving grace and calm in the storm for the whole thing was my colleague Nadra, who kept me sane and was an excellent travel companion for the second week in a row. She's going with me to Prague next week as well. It's a good thing I'm gay, or people would start to talk!

I have done enough trade shows to last me for a year, but at least I get a break until September and can just work. Will be nice to be at home for a while with Wilbert and the kitties. Just one more short trip to Prague on Monday, then I hope to stay put for the rest of the summer!

No additional restaurants of note to report. Rome's Airport Hilton is a comfortable, modern facility if you ever need to stay there, but like all airport hotels, you pay about a 25% premium. Nice business hotel, decent buffet, but get there before 22.00 and pay €30 instead of €37. A small bottle of Coke is around €5! Outrageous! In the Executive Lounge on the 5th floor, the exact same bottles are free!

Kupela restaurant (Madrid, Spain)

Kupela
Marqués de Cubas, 8 - 28014 Madrid
+34 91 523 3450 - info@restaurantekupela.com http://www.restaurantekupela.com/

So good that we went two nights in a row! This piece of the Basque Country in the middle of Spain could create enough good will with its food to end the conflict between the two parties! Located with ZERO fanfare on a small side street of Calle Alcalá, it's a fantastic place for either an intimate dinner or a large group of friends because of its several small rooms.

The food is very Basque and very good. We took the ciderhouse (sidrería) menu both nights, which included a cup of hard apple cider (definitely an acquired taste, but I acquired it long ago), thin, spicey txistorra sausages, a cod omelette, and very rare (read: bleeding) gigantic ribeye steaks (chuletón) cut into strips to share. The traditional dessert is idiazabal cheese, whole walnuts and quince (membrillo). Other people enjoyed small red peppers stuffed with cod, small squid (txipirones) served in their own ink, and other Basque delights.

The service was brilliant. The second night we showed up with 9 very rowdy, happy people at a few mnutes before midnight (when the kitchen was supposed to close), but they admitted us without complaint and catered to our every whim and fancy for more than two hours. Really well done, muchachos!

We of course ended our meal with a glass of homemade patxaran, a Basque anis liquer cured with currant berries served on the rocks. The stuff of gods! :-)

Seriously worth a detour to find in Madrid!

Wilbert and I in Greece

Like many tourists in Athens, one day we decided to go on a day-long tour of the Greek islands. It was a giant boat with every conceivable nationality on board, though Asians seemed to predominate, as they tend to travel the globe in large groups. Lots of little culture clashes to witness over the course of the day... interesting. All in all a LONG but fun day!

The Clubhouse restaurant (Vouliagmeni, Greece)

Situated in the Astir Palace resort complex, about 20 minutes outside of Athens, this restaurant sports the single most stunning view of any restaurant many of us had ever eaten in (with La Perla in San Sebastian, Spain, running a close second). It has an almost trendy interior, but where it really shines is the patio that overlooks one of the many small bays that dot the peninsula it's on. Stunning.

A self-proclaimed "gourmet restaurant", the food was good but not meriting any stars. Most of us had seafood risotto and pasta and were satisfied but not blown away. The staff was very helpful and attentive. Price-wise you certainly pay for the view, but it's worth it.

So all-in-all, definitely worth a try if you're in the area. But make sure to bring both your hunger and your camera! And make sure to time your visit for sunset!

If you're looking for a similar view but a dining experience a few notches down in both quality, service and price, try the restaurant in the Nafsika hotel that's also part of the Astir complex.

Zorbas Restaurant (Athens/Mikrolimano, Greece)

http://www.zorbasrestaurant.gr/

Purportedly one of the best retaurants in the small Mikrolimano port area outside of Athens and on the other side of Piraeus. Right at the beginning of the road that circles the port, with the restaurant on one side of the street and a well-appointed terrace right on the water, where we sat.

The view was lovely. We arrived before 9, so the sun was still up. They made good wine and fresh seafood recommendations - we had a mixed appetizer plate of fresh shrimp and calamari, and for our main course we each had a whole red snapper, which was delightfully seasoned and cooked. For dessert we shared a strawberry millefeuille (sp?) and something else I no longer remember, also good.

So in all, the food was good to excellent (and we got out of there for under EUR150 including a playful, crisp bottle of Greek red).

The service, however, ruined the night. It was abismally slow. As a former American, I am still more sensitive to this than most Europeans, but in general in Greece, the wait staff seems more interested in discussing/arguing with each other than serving customers. It took our food a little bit longer than was acceptable (even by Southern European standards, which are slower), but the piece de resistance was when we asked for the check and a taxi at the same time and the taxi arrived 15 minutes before the check did (forcing us to pay a waiting fee on the meter - good thing Greek taxi's are so cheap).

In short, the good quality of the food and view was overshadowed by the poor service, and we left feeling like we would try a different restaurant next time.

www.zorbasrestaurant.gr